Don’t Quit

weeklywalk42

Every parent wants their child to be successful and smart. Right?

A person’s natural level of intelligence is not really something one can control, kind of like who your parents are or your race. You get what you get, at least until we figure out how to create perfection via genetics. In the meantime, we’re left to make the best of what we have.

In America, new parents begin early setting their children up for success by getting their children ready for school. We encourage them to teach colors, numbers, etc. There are bookoodles of learning apps and television shows aimed here.

While those academic things are important, they are not the single greatest factor in determining whether or not your child will be successful. The experts always tell us the single greatest predictor of success is whether a child is persistent or not. And…how well he/she can delay gratification.

Please take a moment and ask yourself, “Is my child learning persistence and delayed gratification while ‘learning’ in a virtual play world?”

I placed the word learning in quotes because I’m doubtful they’re learning much real-world information. More helpful to their success and well-rounded development would be things such as eye contact with adults, sharing, dealing with other children, not interrupting others, and handling frustration and anger appropriately. They are not learning those things on a tablet or glued to PBS. Watching a TV show about handling anger isn’t the same thing as having your sister break your favorite toy and not hitting her or breaking her toy. That’s real world vs. the virtual world.

You may believe your child is learning persistence because they spend sooo much time on that tablet ‘learning’. Watch them closely for about thirty minutes. See how long they actually work on one skill, such as learning the letter ‘A’. What they’re likely doing is flitting from one task to another like a butterfly, so they’re never bored or unsuccessful for long.  While there are age differences to factor in, it is never normal for young children (younger than 10) to be sedentary for very long. This is not normal and is not healthy. See my earlier post on self-control and blowing off steam.

Here is a helpful idea to teach persistence and delayed gratification. Find a real-life role model. When Tim Tebow was young, he already wanted to play football. So his mother found him a role model–Danny Wuerffel. Both were examples of young Christian men who displayed talent paired with exemplary persistence. You can do something like that, as well.

When it comes to your child’s success as a Christian, they must learn persistence and delayed gratification. The Christian life is certainly not a bed of roses. It is filled with hills and valleys. I look to God as the best example for younger children. Is there a better example of never relenting, never ceasing, never failing persistence than God’s love for us? He never quits on us. Never.

You want your children to be successful in life, so do I. While I can’t do anything about your or your child’s level of intelligence, I can share with you the key ingredient to success–it is persistence.

I’ll end with this quote:

“Success comes in a lot of ways, but it doesn’t come with money and it doesn’t come with fame. It comes from having a meaning in your life, doing what you love and being passionate about what you do. That’s having a life of success. When you have the ability to do what you love, love what you do and have the ability to impact people. That’s having a life of success. That’s what having a life of meaning is.” – Tim Tebow

Would love to hear your thoughts on this post. Please comment below.

Love y’all,

Ginny

P.S. Final thoughts:

  1. Here’s the link to my children’s song “Giddy Up”. It’s about persistence/perseverance.
  2. July newsletter coming soon. Have you signed up yet? This month I’m sharing thoughts on a mom’s most important job PLUS many great book recommendations for you and your children. And, you really don’t want to miss the boots I found on Pinterest.

Here’s What’s Missing

weeklywalk41

“Children today can’t seem to control themselves.” If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it a thousand times.

Maybe you’ve said it yourself…or, at least thought it.

Since I work with young children and families, I’m on the front lines of the behavior and parenting styles of today. And yes, it is mostly true that children today can’t seem to control their impulses to speak or move, as much as in years past.

There are many possible reasons for this and little hard evidence backs up any of it. But, here’s what I think and it is only what I think.

  1. Children today are encouraged to go from one thing to another because they play on video games from toddler ages. Yes, those “learning apps” are not teaching persistence, they are promoting short attention spans.
  2. Children today are too cooped up. From infancy, they are almost constantly restrained in a carrier, a bumbo seat, or an exersaucer. Later, they move up to car seats and strollers. They rarely have the freedom to move around and explore without a hovering parent.
  3. Play is too structured and academically oriented. A toddler does not need to know letters and colors as much as they need to know how to deal with anger, not getting their way, and other social skills.
  4. Children need a variety of physical play: swings, slides, climbing, running, spinning, jumping, riding bicycles, etc. They need a lot of this each and every day. I am not talking about organized PE, I’m referring to free play with other children.
  5. Children need one on one time with children to learn how to apologize, forgive, what it feels like to get hit, bumped, shoved, etc. They need to learn how to handle themselves with confidence on a playground without depending on an adult to save them from every little incident.
  6. They need fewer toys to play with. Yes, you read that right. Too many toys! Too many electronic toys! They need things that don’t entertain them constantly because then they’ll expect everything to entertain them–even adults.

As a pediatric physical therapist, I’m totally focused on getting children active and participating in physical activity. But, I also want them to follow the Scripture, “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.”

What I think is missing today are adequate opportunities for children to “blow off steam.” When we see children fidgeting or getting anxious, their bodies may be telling us they need some time to move. If we don’t give children these times and if we don’t stop keeping them too cooped up, they will get frustrated and angry. (Pssst. Adults have the same needs.)

Let’s do the hard work of parenting, friends. Our children deserve better. Life can be hard and frustrating, but God did not give us a safe-space, He gave us a way to live in an unsafe space and learning self-control is essential to surviving in an unsafe world.

Love y’all,

Ginny

P.S. My funny song, Freeze, will help you teach them to get their bodies quietened down. Click here.

Join the conversation and share your thoughts in the comments below.

Children Need Chores

weeklywalk40

“Does your child pick up her toys when asked?” I waited.

The young mom looked bewildered as she pondered her answer. Continue reading “Children Need Chores”

Hear Ye, Hear Ye!

[Special Edition]

Before our last presidential election, many of us prayed (and continue to pray) for the unseen to become seen. Well God has answered and continues to answer, those prayers.

Now I pray, and I ask you to join me, for the fortitude to keep my eyes on the poisonous revelations and to not shy away from holding the light steady as we march the guilty to their just punishments.

I pray for us to not lose hope in America and for us to turn our attention back to our founding principles which were all built on God and His truths.

I pray for wisdom and peace in dealing with those I disagree with, sometimes vehemently so.

I ask for eyes to see what God wants me to do and to accept what action He gives me.

I ask for perseverance to stay the course when the rewards or blue ribbons don’t come.

I pray for discernment with whom I can work and with whom I can’t.

I pray God, let the cleansing begin with me.

Please join me for the next #40daysofprayerforAmerica

If you feel led, comment below if you are participating.

Also, please share on all of your social media platforms and use the #40daysofprayerforAmerica  and #riseup hashtags.

Let’s get this prayer chain trending!

Love y’all,

Ginny

 

 

Houston? We have a problem.

weeklywalk39

The cultural handwringing continues.

Our president doesn’t tell the truth. Our justice department isn’t telling the truth. Our church leadership isn’t telling the truth. Our news media isn’t telling the truth.

What’s a parent to do?

Let’s ask ourselves these questions:

  • Do I tell the truth ALL the time?
  • Or, do I shade the truth to my best advantage?

Our children are inundated with lies and this will continue throughout their entire lives. Social media and our advanced technologies have only magnified this fact. It is impossible to tell truth from fiction in the virtual world.

That is one essential danger of allowing your children to inhabit the virtual world. They need to stay grounded in reality where it is necessary to face, and learn to deal with, the imperfections of the world.

God knows the world is broken and He knows we’re broken. However, does He say, “Go ahead and act like the world?”  No.

Does He prefer we live in our make-believe creations?

No. I don’t think so.

He calls us to stay engaged in the real world where people lie, cheat, steal, and kill each other. A place no one really prefers to be, but it is the place we humans, without God, have created.

Now, we humans, thinking ourselves so intelligent, have discovered a way to escape this awful place we have created. It’s called the internet.

Houston? We have a problem.

Before you despair and leave me to check Facebook, here’s some hope:

  • Pray over your own conduct with regard to honesty
  • Begin to improve in this area (little by little)
  • Refrain from pointing fingers at the lies of others, without first acknowledging your own failures in this area
  • Hold your children to a high standard of honesty (you know they’ll falter, we all do, but God still keeps the standard high)
  • Be the moral gatekeeper in your house

Yes, our culture is rotten. Everyone is dishonest and self-seeking. It’s called sin. It is what Man truly is, rotten and self-seeking.

Help your children learn the truth about God and His standards of behavior. Teach them about sin and how we are all guilty of it. Help them discover grace and let them see you offer it to others. Dealing with the reality of our world, with godly character, will help them deal with all the disappointments that will come their way.

Do you have a successful parent tip to share or a story we may enjoy? Please comment below. Others need encouragement.

Love y’all,

Ginny

P.S. Write this verse on an index card and post it on your refrigerator. You and your children can memorize it together.

“Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.” Psalm 34:13

 

 

 

Bring Back the Golden Rule

weeklywalk37

Summer has finally arrived! The children are free of homework and so are you. Yay!!!

But, it won’t be long before your children are whining, “We’re bored.” They’ll tire of swimming, running around all day in swimsuits or pajamas, and watching TV.

So what’s a mom to do? You’ve come to the right place. I want to encourage you to take the next seven or so weeks and teach your children the most important thing you are to teach them–how to be a good person.

The world tells us, no…pressures us, to get our children ready. Ready for school by learning colors, shapes, and letters before they even register. Ready for sports and potential scholarships by signing them up for pee wee ball, swim teams, or basketball. Start early or you’ll miss out we’re told.

Here’s a question for you: while they’re learning those other skills, who teaches them to be a good person? A person who is honest and trustworthy, one who persists through adversity, one who controls their mouth and bodies, one who can be kind and treat others as they want to be treated, one who is brave?

Will the world teach them these virtues? The overworked and underpaid daycare teachers? The overworked and underpaid school teachers? The coaches? The Disney Channel or PBS?

No. Many may try, but let’s get real here…they aren’t paid to do that. They are paid for academic or athletic performance. They are in the business of teaching about fantasies or global warming. They may care but they are not responsible for teaching godly morals.

Teaching godly morals to your children is your job. And, it may be your most important one. Agree?

If you do, let’s start this summer. Don’t get anxious ’cause I’ve developed a chart and some songs to help.

Download the >>7 DAYS AND 7 WAYS CHART

Here’s the link for songs

This week, let’s work on teaching the Golden Rule. Remember it?

It may be old, but it’s still true,

treat other people like you want them to treat you

 (lyric from The Golden Rule song)

No matter what your children achieve in life, whether they become an All American, a plumber, or the head of a major corporation, you and all of us want them to be a good person. Good, so they don’t lose their standing or fine name and good, so they contribute to a better community and our overall society.

This is God’s charge to you. You are to “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

There is no one to delegate to and no app to do it for you. It takes work and consistent performance on your part to model what you desire for them to copy.

Before you throw up your hands, think about this…what do you truly wish for your children? For them to make lots of money and be successful (whatever that means) or do you want them to be good and decent at whatever they do in life?

When you watch the news, you probably ask yourself this question, “What’s wrong?” We have children killing each other, we have teachers cheating on test scores, we have leaders skimming profits for themselves, and we have the world winking and, in effect, telling our children it’s okay.

Well, we know it isn’t. You can’t do anything about what others do, but you can teach your children the right ways. No one else will.

This week, join me in bringing back the Golden Rule. It’s one of God’s ways. Make sure you practice it and your children do, too.

God’s ways are best today and always.

Love y’all,

Ginny.

P.S. I’d love your comments on how this week goes. Join me on social media, too!

 

 

Face the Fear

weeklywalk36

In his first inaugural address to the nation in 1933, Franklin D. Roosevelt said, “This great Nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”

About all any of us recall of his speech was the infamous quote, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” But, it is so easy to fear the fear. There’s even a medical term for it–phobophobia. This is the fear of the internal sensations associated with fear, the tingliness, the panic, the floaty and out-of-body sensations which are so unpleasant.

I’ve experienced fear of the fear and can tell you without reservation, it is real. However, I can also testify to you the power of facing the fear and using God’s words to defeat it.

We are told in the Ephesians 6:17:

“Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

The word of God, the Scriptures, are the weapon to use against fear. Say to the spirit of fear, the devil, “You are a liar! I have nothing to fear for God is stronger than you.”

You will have to say it over and over and over. The devil is a persistent enemy and must be faced with confidence each and every time.

Whatever you are fearing, even if it is fear itself, choose to believe God is stronger and use His words to combat and overcome the lying words of the devil, those words he whispers to you, such as “You’re not good enough.”

My prayer for you this week is you begin the process of following God’s ways when it comes to doing battle with fear.

Here’s a wonderful song you may not have heard.

Remember words have extreme power–both nice ones and hurtful ones. The devil, yes he is real, only tells you the hurtful ones. Decide today and tomorrow, to only listen and believe the ones God tells you: you are beautiful, you are loved, you are forgiven, you need me.

Love y’all and know God’s ways are best, today and always!

Ginny

P.S. New stuff coming next week. Follow me on social media and, if you haven’t yet, sign up for the newsletter!